One day soon this body will be lying face up on a cold metal table in some nondescript morgue and I will have finally departed to the next world. Whether it's moments or decades from now is irrelevant. Love in this place is very unique and so much of our time is escaping us. The experience of truly sharing life with someone despite the whole damn world trying to use and tear us apart is an opportunity for an altogether different kind of satisfaction. Having our hearts broken also yields an especially intense longing like metal being hardened between fire and water. This terrible loneliness feels as though it has befriended me for a thousand lifetimes and I fear that it may keep me forevermore. I cannot deny that there is more to learn from suffering than peace, and sorrow than happiness. I will rebel until freedom and ecstasy find me either in life or death. May God forgive us for hoping that it happens here first in the midst of this man-made hell.